Marriage

Who can be married at our parishes - St. Alphonsus, St. Benedict and St. John?

Typically, couples preparing for marriage are registered members of our Parish Family. The Catholic Church has a long-standing tradition of celebrating the sacraments within one's own parish community, where individuals and families live out their faith and participate in parish life.

There are, however, exceptions. For example, some couples choose to celebrate their wedding in the parish where they grew up, where they received their sacraments, or where their parents are active members. If you have a particular situation or questions about eligibility, please do not hesitate to contact us. We would be happy to assist you.

Who is able to officiate at weddings in the church?

Our pastor, Fr. Colin Parrish, or our Parochial Vicar, Fr. Paul Nkolombidzo, are typically the celebrants for weddings within our Parish Family. However, permission may be granted for another priest or deacon to officiate. This often occurs when the couple has a family member or close friend who is a priest or deacon and wishes to preside at their wedding celebration.

Are individuals who have been married before able to be married in the Catholic Church?

This depends on the specific circumstances of each situation. If either person has been previously married and is now divorced, an annulment from the Church is generally required before a new marriage can be celebrated in the Catholic Church.  If you have questions or would like guidance regarding your situation, please contact our parish advocate for annulments at annulment@stjohnsea.org.

What preparation is needed for couples wishing to be married in the church?

Marriage in the Catholic Church is a sacrament and a lifetime commitment—preparation is vital to ensuring that the bride and groom are ready to enter into this serious, life-affirming and life-long commitment.

We ask that couples participate in Catholic Marriage Prep Online, a program run by Agape ministries.

In addition, couples can also choose to attend an Engaged Encounter weekend or a retreat sponsored by the Seattle Archdiocese. We ask that couples attend 2-3 pre-marriage counseling sessions with an approved counselor, 2 meetings with our Pastor, Parochial Vicar  (or the priest/deacon who will officiate at the wedding). All this is to ensure that both parties truly understand the depth of the commitment of marriage. Every couple has told us they found the sessions helpful for their relationship!

When are weddings typically scheduled?

We generally celebrate weddings on Fridays and Saturdays, but contact us if you are considering a different day. Due to the solemn nature of the season, the Church discourages celebration of weddings during the season of Lent.



Specific times depend on church and priest availability, but generally Friday weddings are in the late afternoon and Saturday weddings in the late morning or early afternoon. Rehearsals are usually planned one to two days prior to the wedding, at a mutually agreeable time for couple and wedding coordinator. 

Do Catholic weddings always take place during Mass?

It depends on the specific situation. When both bride and groom are Catholic, and a majority of the guests will be Catholic, a nuptial mass is the usual celebration. When one of the parties is not Catholic, then the nuptial rite without mass is the preferred celebration. We will discuss these options at the meeting with the wedding coordinator.

Does the church have policies regarding the content of the wedding service, the music to be used, etc?

Yes, but the couple has many choices they get to make! The service itself is set out in the Rite of Marriage book. The couple however, will make their own choices from the book of the first reading, the second reading, the Gospel, the responsorial psalm, and will write their own Prayer of the Faithful (also called intercessions).

Similarly, the couple will have many options for music to choose, in coordination with our parish music director.

We’re parishioners—how do we arrange to schedule our wedding?

If you are a parishioner of the parish, you may begin scheduling a wedding by contacting our Sacramental Coordinator no less than 6 months before your desired wedding date. Dates available depend on our church commitments and priest availability.

How can someone who is not a parishioner schedule a wedding on the church calendar?

We kindly ask that couples either be registered members of our parish or have a strong and established connection to your selected parish. To begin the process and discuss your situation, please contact our Sacramental Coordinator. We will be happy to guide you through the next steps.

IMPORTANT NOTE:

Please complete the above steps before finalizing any arrangements for your reception venue, photographer, florist, or other vendors. We strongly encourage you to contact the parish first to confirm your wedding date and ensure a smooth and coordinated planning process.

Is there a fee for the wedding?

Yes. A church use fee is required for weddings in our parishes. This fee helps cover the cost of essential services provided by the parish, including the wedding coordinator, sacristan, custodial staff, and the parish business office, as well as utilities such as heating and electricity. Additional fees may apply for musicians, and these will be discussed during your meeting with the wedding coordinator. Monetary gift for the priest is not required.

No parishioner of our Parish Family is ever turned away due to inability to pay. Parishioner rates are offered in recognition of the commitment of registered, active, and contributing members of the parish community. To ensure fairness, this rate is generally reserved for those who have been registered and actively participating for at least six months prior to scheduling the wedding.

A $250 deposit is required at the time the wedding date is scheduled to reserve the church. This deposit is applied toward the total church use fee and is refundable up to six months before the wedding date.